2011

If I evaluate 2010 based on how well I met my list of objectives, then the year was one big flop.  I may have done a little bit of one or two of those items, but for the most part, I’m in very much the same rut now as I was then.  That is, of course, if I want to consider it a rut and if I want to evaluate my year based on a rattled-off list of activities that I one day decided would make my life perfectly balanced and enviable–activities which, by the way, probably reflect more of other people’s priorities and happy-makers than they should.*

Blegh.  No.  Let’s not.

When I remember 2010, I definitely won’t be remembering that I didn’t cook a new dish every month or that I didn’t read enough books, nor will I congratulate myself on figuring out how to keep this giant house clean most of the time and learning how to better manage my workload.  I won’t think about any of the garbage that caused major changes in how I felt about where and with whom I work.  Those aren’t the things going into the 2010 files in permanent storage in my brain.  Nope.  Not even a little.  And that’s probably another compelling reason that choosing a word for the year, instead of a list of resolutions, works better for me.  For 2011, I’m going with

Sometimes mine gets lost. . . and those are the less attractive moments of life.  Sometimes I need a new one.  Often, if I think about someone else’s, I’m more kind and patient.  And seeking out and experiencing alternative ones always makes me a better person–sometimes more informed, sometimes more conscientious, but always somehow better.

So this year will be dedicated to perspective:  to seeing things from multiple angles and distances, to maintaining an authentic one, and to remembering that they’re all relative.

_________________________

*Note to self:  Look, kid, you’re 33.  And you’re not a silly little inexperienced, immature 33 either.  You have your shit together. . . at least a good part of it.  That doesn’t mean it’s too late to branch out into new things.  Of course it doesn’t.  Don’t be ridiculous.  It does, though, mean that you should be beyond trying on other people’s priorities and lives.  This isn’t a costume party.  And you’ve never liked the available slutty girl costumes anyway.

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That’s right. I’m a girl who finishes things.

Here’s the list (with limited journaling because most of that’s for me):

Places I want to travel

1. Sonoma

2. St. Lucia

3. Ireland

4. Tuscany

Things I want to own

5. 2010 Honda CR-V (Black with black leather interior, 4wd, MP3 jack, and moon roof)

6. The Camera

7. iPhone 4g

8. The Dyson Pet Vacuum

9. A pair of Chucks in every color of the rainbow (but starting with yellow and green)

. . . for my life

10. A nice booty. . . actually, a nice bod that results from regular Pilates, but a booty would be a good start

11. Some kind of personal style that’s NOT the mindless Bee uniform

12. Cute, colorful, fun, livable organization — In my dream June-Cleaver-meets-Martha-Stewart-but-so-much-cooler world, I am an incredibly organized woman with a cleverly and cutely organized home.

. . . for the house

13. A sweet man cave (that will really be an HP and Bee cave) complete with bar, giant tv, surround sound, and pool, poker, and air hockey tables

14. An organized office that is pretty and that has spunky personality

15. Spa-like bathrooms for us and for our guests

16. A beautiful backyard with pristine flowerbeds and a built-in pool and hot tub

17. Dinner parties in said backyard

18. A nursery

Artists I want to see in concert

19. James Morrison — soulful, smart, survivor-style tunes

20. Sister Hazel — MAD sweet harmonies

21. Sugarland — Don’t judge.  Jennifer Nettles can outsing anyone.

22. Elton John — Classic

23. Lady Antebellum — A real trio with sick harmony skills

More for my life

24. Learn to cook the kinds of meals that make people excited and to learn how to arrange flowers and place settings and all the other bells and whistles that make guests feel special.  Learn to entertain.  Then do it.  Often!

25. Be that couple — the couple who’s so in love, even after decades of marriage, that we disgust people.  Be happy.  Choose it and make it happen.

26. Be an inspired version of myself.  Be who I could be if I were the leading lady in a movie–a cool, pretty movie about an amazing girl who makes the world a better place, especially for those she loves.

27.  “Remember happiness is a way of travel, not a destination.”

28.  The image reads “There is a direct correlation between the level of happiness in one’s life and the amount of silliness they allow into it,” she said.  “I know.  I’ve done studies.”  And my journaling here says this: Dear God — Please don’t ever let me forget that my silliness is a gift; that my willingness to be a carefree, goofy soul is part of my appeal; that grown up, somber seriousness is seriously over-rated, and that this is what makes me happy (so that’s all that really matters).

29. Remember Sara Henderson — “Don’t wait for a light to appear at the end of the tunnel; stride down there and light the bloody thing yourself!”

30.  From a magazine — “I’m a Busy Bee, Mover-and-Shaker, Up & At ’em.”  My journaling — And I’m not afraid to let my freak flag fly, Baby!